As I watching Gilmore Girls the other day, there was a scene that really struck a chord with me this time. I had seen the episode a few several thousand times but it didn't mean to me what it did this time.
LORELAI: What’s going on between you two?
SOOKIE: I asked him if he’d like to have dinner sometime.
LORELAI: I know - weeks ago.
SOOKIE: And he said yes.
LORELAI: Which is good.
SOOKIE: But since there’s not definite plan or date attached, now the invitation is just out there floating in the universe.
LORELAI: So make a definite plan.
SOOKIE: I can’t.
SOOKIE: Because what if he says no?
LORELAI: He already said yes.
SOOKIE: Yes to the amorphous, theoretical, 'Let’s maybe sometime go out and do something not too specific' proposition. But dinner and a movie - it’s concrete. It’s real, he might say no.
LORELAI: I doubt he will.
SOOKIE: Well why hasn’t he asked me?
LORELAI: I don’t know, maybe he thinks you’ve changed your mind since you asked.
SOOKIE: Well why would he think that?
LORELAI: Because you haven’t mentioned it again.
SOOKIE: But I mentioned it once, it’s his turn.
LORELAI: Alright, let’s say it is his turn, you can spend a lot of time sitting around waiting for him to realize it’s his turn, or you can just run with the wolves and make it your turn again.
SOOKIE: I don’t want it to be my turn again.
LORELAI: You just wanna let this opportunity pass?
SOOKIE: I wanna be the girl.
LORELAI: You are the girl. That’s why we’re having this very confusing conversation.
SOOKIE: You think I should ask him out?
LORELAI: On Sunday.
SOOKIE: Why Sunday?
LORELAI: Because that’s your day off.
LORELAI: I think you should do it now before you lose your nerve.
SOOKIE: Well he’s not back to his office yet.
LORELAI: Does he have a cell phone?
LORELAI: You know people buy cell phones for exactly this reason - so you could get a hold of them anytime you want. SOOKIE: I thought people bought cell phones in case their cars broke down at night and they needed to call someone for help and there’s psycho killers -
LORELAI: Call him.
SOOKIE: Call him?
LORELAI: Call him Sookie.
SOOKIE: Call him [giggles]
[They go over to the phone]
LORELAI: Mmm, she knows his number by heart.
SOOKIE: He is my produce guy.
LORELAI: Very convenient excuse.
SOOKIE: He - [into the phone] Oh Jackson? It’s Sookie. [picks up a wooden spoon and plays with it in her hair] I was wondering if you could call me back when you get a chance, sooner rather than later, it’s not an emergency so don’t freak out or anything. The carrots still look good. It seems like it’s almost a shame to eat them, sort of like you should put them in a vase or -
LORELAI: [whispers] Sookie, hang up. Hang up.
SOOKIE: Call me, bye. [giggles] Got his voice mail.
LORELAI: Ok good. It give you time to prepare what you’re going to say. Maybe have a few suggestions ready of places to go.
SOOKIE: Date prep time.
SOOKIE: Ok good. I’m good at that. I’m good at prep. [picks up a pad of paper]
LORELAI: Sookie……spoon. [takes spoon away.]
To me, this scene says it all. The girls are always afraid to make the "first move" because that's supposed to be the guys job. At least as far as society is concerned. But, then I've heard all sorts of stories about how the guy was nervous and was afraid of being rejected so he didn't say anything, even when the girl felt the same way. Feelings and words went left unsaid and nothing ever happened. I think if you feel something pretty strongly, you should go for it. Who cares if you're the girl trying to talk to the guy or if you're a guy worried she might say no? Wouldn't you rather know for sure that wonder the rest of your life what could've happened 'if only...'?
SOOKIE: Oh thank you. [to Lorelai] I should cancel.
LORELAI: Ok, let’s do you lips first.
SOOKIE: What if I’m making an idiot out of myself.
LORELAI: By going out on a date?
SOOKIE: With my produce guy.
LORELAI: You like him.
SOOKIE: But what if tonight is a disaster and them he won’t sell to me anymore.
LORELAI: Oh my God, you’re right.
SOOKIE: Yes, see!
LORELAI: And since all the produce in the entire world is in his possession and all the produce that will be grown in the future will be in his possession, then we will never again be able to get any produce and all our vegetarian clients will die.
SOOKIE: I’m scared.
LORELAI: I know.
SOOKIE: I like him.
LORELAI: He likes you.
SOOKIE: How do you know he’s not being polite?
SOOKIE: No I mean it. [gets up and paces] It’s like I cornered him and he felt trapped and he had to say yes.
LORELAI: He did not have to say yes.
SOOKIE: Oh my God. Technically I am his employer.
SOOKIE: I am, I buy his wares. His livelihood depends on my.
SOOKIE: Oh! I’m a sexual harasser
LORELAI: Well then you need some false eyelashes.
SOOKIE: This isn’t funny. I am now desperate, lonely and a criminal.
LORELAI: Ok, stop talking.
SOOKIE: But -
LORELAI: No you have exhauster all you talking rights by being crazy. Sit down and listen.
LORELAI: Tonight is a good thing. Whether you find out that you’re madly in love you or you’re not meant for each other, it’s still a good thing. And I’ll be right there. And have I done a gorgeous job on your face or what? Ooh, I’ll be right back [picking up clips]
Here, I love Lorelai's advice to Sookie; one way or another Sookie will find out if her and Jackson should continue their relationship or if they were never meant to be at all. It's a good thing either way, and sometimes we just freak ourselves out so much, when we could just dive in and see what happens.