January 13, 2012
He's Just Not That Into You Quote
"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your own happy ending. Every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the one exception to the rule. But, sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn to read the signs. How to tell the ones who want us from the ones that don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe...it's you on your own, picking up the pieces, and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is ...just...moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken hearts, the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope."
January 12, 2012
My Motto..pretty much always!
'Speak now or forever hold your peace', the words said by preachers at the end of wedding ceremonies all over the world, right before the vows. It's a last chance for protest, a moment that makes everyone's heart race, and a moment I've always been strangely fascinated by. So many fantasize about bursting into a church, saying what they'd kept inside for years like in the movies. In real life, it rarely happens.
Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I've began to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything.
I think most of us fear reaching the end of our life, and looking back regretting the moments we didn't speak up. When we didn't say 'I love you'. When we should've said 'I'm sorry'. When we didn't stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help.
These songs are made up of words I didn't say when the moment was right is front of me. These songs are open letters. Each is written with a specific person in mind, telling them what I meant to tell them in person. To the beautiful boy whose heart I broke in December. To my first love who I never thought would be my first heartbreak. To my band. To a mean man I used to be afraid of. To someone who made my world very dark for a while. To a girl who stole something of mine. To someone I forgive for what he said in front of the whole world.
Words can break someone into a million pieces, but they can also put them back together. I hope you use yours for good, because the only words you'll regret more than the ones left unsaid are the ones you use to intentionally hurt someone.
What you say might be too much for some people. Maybe it will come out all wrong and you'll stutter and you'll walk away embarrased, wincing as you play it all back in your head. But I think the words you stop yourself from saying are the ones that will haunt you the longest.
So say it to them. Or say it to yourself in the mirror. Say it in a letter you'll never send or in a book millions might read someday. I think you deserve to look back on your life without a chorus of resounding voices saying 'I could've, but it's too late now.'
There is a time for silence. There is a time waiting your turn. But if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say, you'll know it.
I don't think you should wait. I think you should speak now
Love,
Taylor
Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I've began to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything.
I think most of us fear reaching the end of our life, and looking back regretting the moments we didn't speak up. When we didn't say 'I love you'. When we should've said 'I'm sorry'. When we didn't stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help.
These songs are made up of words I didn't say when the moment was right is front of me. These songs are open letters. Each is written with a specific person in mind, telling them what I meant to tell them in person. To the beautiful boy whose heart I broke in December. To my first love who I never thought would be my first heartbreak. To my band. To a mean man I used to be afraid of. To someone who made my world very dark for a while. To a girl who stole something of mine. To someone I forgive for what he said in front of the whole world.
Words can break someone into a million pieces, but they can also put them back together. I hope you use yours for good, because the only words you'll regret more than the ones left unsaid are the ones you use to intentionally hurt someone.
What you say might be too much for some people. Maybe it will come out all wrong and you'll stutter and you'll walk away embarrased, wincing as you play it all back in your head. But I think the words you stop yourself from saying are the ones that will haunt you the longest.
So say it to them. Or say it to yourself in the mirror. Say it in a letter you'll never send or in a book millions might read someday. I think you deserve to look back on your life without a chorus of resounding voices saying 'I could've, but it's too late now.'
There is a time for silence. There is a time waiting your turn. But if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say, you'll know it.
I don't think you should wait. I think you should speak now
Love,
Taylor
Technology
I'm all for technology! I'm really big on the whole social media networking thing, if you couldn't tell before: Twitter, Facebook, Blogging, Tumblr, etc. I could go on and on about these new sites that keep popping up. It's a way to share and document your memories, see what your friends are up to, keep up with family, stay up to date on the latest Hollywood news, find out more about events, see where your favorite celebs are hanging out and a way to meet new people.
However, technology can also ruin a lot. So many people (myself included) end up spending so much time updating their statuses, checking Twitter feeds, looking up an internet site, blogging, posting pictures, trying to get a celebrity to tweet them back and all sorts of other things, that they neglect a life outside of that. We are all so caught up in screens these days with our cell phones, computers, iPads, and TV's that we hardly have time to look up and just enjoy our surroundings.
It seems like the ever since technology took a big jump in the past couple years, we've forgotten to use our imaginations, because we have the internet at our fingertips to tell us everything. We rely so much on that to find out what our friends are up to that we don't just talk to them. It also ruins the element of surprise when it comes to TV shows and music, because so many spoilers and pictures and music clips are leaked; it feels like we've already heard everything by the time it (whatever it is) comes out. It also means there's less to talk about with your friends when you get together. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to tell my friends or family about something that I'm really excited about, only to have them tell me, "I saw that on Facebook!" I ruin my own surprise.
I think it's time for me to take a little technology break, which might be hard having online classes...but we'll see how this goes. I think it's just time to get outside more, and just get more of a life. I just want to live in the moment more, and not be so paranoid about whether I've missed a great tweet or text. It'll still be there when I look at my phone or computer screen later on. It's time to just enjoy some "me" time, focus more on God, and get some of my creativity and imagination back. :)
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
However, technology can also ruin a lot. So many people (myself included) end up spending so much time updating their statuses, checking Twitter feeds, looking up an internet site, blogging, posting pictures, trying to get a celebrity to tweet them back and all sorts of other things, that they neglect a life outside of that. We are all so caught up in screens these days with our cell phones, computers, iPads, and TV's that we hardly have time to look up and just enjoy our surroundings.
It seems like the ever since technology took a big jump in the past couple years, we've forgotten to use our imaginations, because we have the internet at our fingertips to tell us everything. We rely so much on that to find out what our friends are up to that we don't just talk to them. It also ruins the element of surprise when it comes to TV shows and music, because so many spoilers and pictures and music clips are leaked; it feels like we've already heard everything by the time it (whatever it is) comes out. It also means there's less to talk about with your friends when you get together. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to tell my friends or family about something that I'm really excited about, only to have them tell me, "I saw that on Facebook!" I ruin my own surprise.
I think it's time for me to take a little technology break, which might be hard having online classes...but we'll see how this goes. I think it's just time to get outside more, and just get more of a life. I just want to live in the moment more, and not be so paranoid about whether I've missed a great tweet or text. It'll still be there when I look at my phone or computer screen later on. It's time to just enjoy some "me" time, focus more on God, and get some of my creativity and imagination back. :)
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
"And even though you'll want to...Please try to never grow up!" ~Taylor Swift
Twenty. That's two decades. 1/5 of a century. Either way I look at it, I'm getting old. It's crazy to think that I've been on this earth for 20 whole years now. Whoa...
I remember the day I turned 13; it was pretty much the best birthday ever. I was finally a teenager, and from all I had seen on TV, the teen years were supposed to be the best of your life. You'd be in high school, you could date, get your license, and do all sorts of other cool things that you just couldn't do as a kid. It was also my "golden birthday", because I turned 13 on the 13th. I went to school that day, had lunch with my mom off campus, one of my close friends Mandy (who's like my sister) brought flowers to my school, and that night I had a sleepover with my cousins. We watched 13 Going On 30, I opened presents, we played games, and watched Newlyweds (with Nick and Jessica) all night pretty much. Leaving that on all night and talking loudly made my mom come out a few times to tell us to go to bed soon, and us laughing hysterically after she'd leave. It was the year I decided I was going to marry Chad Michael Murray (hahahaa...wishful thinking!), switched to a new school, made some new friends that I'm still close with, and so many other things that really made an impact on the life I have now.
I don't know if my "teen" years were the best ones yet, but they were pretty wonderful looking back. I finally took a chance on things I'd always wanted to, grew in my faith a little more, opened up more, found out more about myself and the strength I have...and of course, all the fun things that high school brings. Were they like I thought they'd be thanks to Full House or Boy Meets World? Hardly. But, there were some great times that I will never forget as long as I live. I complained a lot and I had a really bad attitude a lot of the time, and things were probably never as bad as they seemed. There were times I was unhappy, but others that I couldn't contain my happiness. There were some really bad days, but also really good ones, and I'll be grateful for both of them, because it shaped me into who I am today.
Reminiscing on birthdays past, I had some really great parties/celebrations:
I'm excited to see what my 20's will be like. I know there'll be some really exciting times, but probably some really trying times as well. Whatever is about to happen, I'm ready for the ride. God is in control...I am not; something I have to continually remind myself of. So, here's to the 20s: To being fearless and not holding back, trusting my instincts more, let go of the past, to not let bitterness and anger from past situations affect right now, to not be so hard on myself and others, to trust God above all else, and to live in the moment.
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
I remember the day I turned 13; it was pretty much the best birthday ever. I was finally a teenager, and from all I had seen on TV, the teen years were supposed to be the best of your life. You'd be in high school, you could date, get your license, and do all sorts of other cool things that you just couldn't do as a kid. It was also my "golden birthday", because I turned 13 on the 13th. I went to school that day, had lunch with my mom off campus, one of my close friends Mandy (who's like my sister) brought flowers to my school, and that night I had a sleepover with my cousins. We watched 13 Going On 30, I opened presents, we played games, and watched Newlyweds (with Nick and Jessica) all night pretty much. Leaving that on all night and talking loudly made my mom come out a few times to tell us to go to bed soon, and us laughing hysterically after she'd leave. It was the year I decided I was going to marry Chad Michael Murray (hahahaa...wishful thinking!), switched to a new school, made some new friends that I'm still close with, and so many other things that really made an impact on the life I have now.
I don't know if my "teen" years were the best ones yet, but they were pretty wonderful looking back. I finally took a chance on things I'd always wanted to, grew in my faith a little more, opened up more, found out more about myself and the strength I have...and of course, all the fun things that high school brings. Were they like I thought they'd be thanks to Full House or Boy Meets World? Hardly. But, there were some great times that I will never forget as long as I live. I complained a lot and I had a really bad attitude a lot of the time, and things were probably never as bad as they seemed. There were times I was unhappy, but others that I couldn't contain my happiness. There were some really bad days, but also really good ones, and I'll be grateful for both of them, because it shaped me into who I am today.
Reminiscing on birthdays past, I had some really great parties/celebrations:
- 13-Sleepover with cousins
- 14-Build a Bear/cruise to Mexico
- 15-Family dinner at Olive Garden/cake and presents at home
- 16-Had friends over for a Hollywood themed party with the coolest cake ever! Got new stuff to redecorate my room with cheetah
- 17-Had friends over for a party, watched movies. Family came over on Sunday. One of my best friends surprised me in my math class (she went to a different high school). My friend, Mandy, also took me out to dinner and a movie.
- 18-The BEST BIRTHDAY EVER! Chuck Wicks called me. Went to Nashville to see Carrie Underwood at the Ryman (2nd row), ate at Demo's, got to shop along Broadway for a little while, met Sheryl Crow...Had a blast!!
- 19-Day at home. Had lunch with my mom, got some cupcakes, and had dinner at Outback. Presents at home.
I'm excited to see what my 20's will be like. I know there'll be some really exciting times, but probably some really trying times as well. Whatever is about to happen, I'm ready for the ride. God is in control...I am not; something I have to continually remind myself of. So, here's to the 20s: To being fearless and not holding back, trusting my instincts more, let go of the past, to not let bitterness and anger from past situations affect right now, to not be so hard on myself and others, to trust God above all else, and to live in the moment.
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
"I live in a world full of people pretending to be something they're not!" ~Austin Ames (A Cinderella Story)
Most of us have heard the saying, "Be yourself" all of our lives, and it sounds simple. You can be whoever you want to be, so why not act like that all the time? But, then you get older and there are more pressures to act a certain way, laugh a certain way, and agree with things that you might not be okay with. It's hard to stand against that when so many others around you might be thinking differently. I've seen it all before: laughing at jokes you might not normally, cussing when you might not usually, etc. And I think at some point or another we've all pretended to be something we're not...because we were trying to figure out who we ARE. I think that's normal...but you have to be careful about not straying so far off track that you forget who you were altogether.
And of course, there are going to be those people that you were really close with, and they change into someone you don't know anymore. That's hard to see. We're all growing up and some are doing it in other ways that you might not. You think about who you used to be, and wonder what if?
Let's just say growing up is tricky.
And of course, there are going to be those people that you were really close with, and they change into someone you don't know anymore. That's hard to see. We're all growing up and some are doing it in other ways that you might not. You think about who you used to be, and wonder what if?
Let's just say growing up is tricky.
Giving Your Best With Nothing In Return
T.H. White said; "Perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically to those who hardly think about us in return." (One Tree Hill)
Unfortunately, most of us know this feeling all too well. We try so hard to be what the people around us need and want, but it seems that most of the time those people aren't willing to give up the same things for us...leaving us with the broken heart in the end. It's not that they've ever expected that of me, it's just how I am. It would just be nice to know that you're wanted or needed back. I know I've experienced this several times. But, over the past couple years, I've stopped trying so hard and putting in so much effort for people who aren't even trying to be in my life anymore.
We should give without expecting anything in return, and I understand that. I'm working on that in other areas. But, it's another feeling completely when you start thinking that maybe people just don't care. They don't text you when they see something that reminds them of you or make any effort to get together with you anymore; that burden's all on you now, because they simply don't care anymore. When it starts becoming such an act of congress to hang out, it almost becomes where it's not worth it anymore. Things that are meant to be shouldn't be that hard to put together...I think they just tend to work themselves out.
Sometimes you just have to learn to let go, and that's hard. The moral of the story here is to give your best to the people that will treat you right and stop worrying about those that don't. If they're meant to be in your life, they will put in some effort too. Until then, hold onto the wonderful memories you once had, and hope for the best in the future. It doesn't mean you have to say goodbye completely, just know that everything happens for a reason, and God will send special people into your life when others walk out. Life always has a way of working itself out. It just does.
I found this quote online, but am not quite sure where it came from, "I thought we'd be friends for many more years, but as time goes on, our pictures fade and all of our good times seem to drift away.We've all grown up, and there's no denying that. But it's tough to tell if in that growing up, we've simply grown apart." It's hard when there's no defining moment or realization of where it all went wrong in a friendship. I think it just means that somewhere along the way someone stopped trying.
Unfortunately, most of us know this feeling all too well. We try so hard to be what the people around us need and want, but it seems that most of the time those people aren't willing to give up the same things for us...leaving us with the broken heart in the end. It's not that they've ever expected that of me, it's just how I am. It would just be nice to know that you're wanted or needed back. I know I've experienced this several times. But, over the past couple years, I've stopped trying so hard and putting in so much effort for people who aren't even trying to be in my life anymore.
We should give without expecting anything in return, and I understand that. I'm working on that in other areas. But, it's another feeling completely when you start thinking that maybe people just don't care. They don't text you when they see something that reminds them of you or make any effort to get together with you anymore; that burden's all on you now, because they simply don't care anymore. When it starts becoming such an act of congress to hang out, it almost becomes where it's not worth it anymore. Things that are meant to be shouldn't be that hard to put together...I think they just tend to work themselves out.
Sometimes you just have to learn to let go, and that's hard. The moral of the story here is to give your best to the people that will treat you right and stop worrying about those that don't. If they're meant to be in your life, they will put in some effort too. Until then, hold onto the wonderful memories you once had, and hope for the best in the future. It doesn't mean you have to say goodbye completely, just know that everything happens for a reason, and God will send special people into your life when others walk out. Life always has a way of working itself out. It just does.
I found this quote online, but am not quite sure where it came from, "I thought we'd be friends for many more years, but as time goes on, our pictures fade and all of our good times seem to drift away.We've all grown up, and there's no denying that. But it's tough to tell if in that growing up, we've simply grown apart." It's hard when there's no defining moment or realization of where it all went wrong in a friendship. I think it just means that somewhere along the way someone stopped trying.
There's A One Tree Hill Quote For Everything
Mark Schwann is one of those rare TV geniuses that has a vision and knows exactly what he wants to do when he gets an idea for something, and he also has a way with the words. That's something that drew me into the show. Even before I'd started watching One Tree Hill, I'd see all these quotes that were so profound and that I actually related to. I remember following One Tree Hill quotes on Twitter long before I got into it, and "favorite"-ing just about everything I saw. In fact, in the first episode (All Tomorrow's Parties) that really got me into the show, I knew one of the quotes by heart because it had become one that always stuck with me at important moments in my life. So here are a few, though I'm sure I'll be posting more and duplicates of some in the very near future.
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| THIS. |
"George Bernard Shaw once wrote, 'There are two tragedies in life: One is to lose your hearts desire and the other is to gain it.' Clearly, Shaw had his heart broken once or twice." ~Brooke
"This year I got everything I wanted and everything I wished for. But, in a way...I lost it even more." ~Haley
"Shaw was right. As we strain to grasp the things we desire, the things we think will make our lives better: money, popularity, fame...we ignore what truly matters: the simple things like friendship, family, love. The things we probably already had." ~Lucas
"Brooke Davis is gonna change the world someday, and I'm not even sure she knows it!" ~Brooke reading out of Lucas' book, An Unkindness of Ravens
"If you could go back and change just one thing about your life, would you? And if you did, would that change ultimately break your heart or the heart of another? Would you choose an entirely different path? Or would you change just one thing? Just one moment...just one moment that you always wanted back."
"Our biggest regrets are not for things we did--but for the things we didn't do. Things we didn't say that could've saved someone we cared about."
"Pray" By: Everly at Team True Beauty Event
So...somehow I had originally thought this song was called "Great" haha...It's actually "Pray." Makes a lot more sense now! Lol.
January 11, 2012
Today was really great! I woke up this morning; watched James Lafferty on KTLA morning news...which is not a bad way to start off the day, might I add ;). I had some coffee and was able to take my time getting ready. My mom and I had lunch with my best friend and her mom for my birthday (Friday). We seriously always have the greatest talks! I love it when the four of us get together, which doesn't happen very often since Laurie is in Michigan for school.
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| Me and Laurie! |
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Butterfinger ice cream...yum! We watched the People's Choice Awards when we got home, which were kind of disappointing really. They weren't as exciting as I thought they'd be, but oh well...Now, I'm off to get ready for bed and finish up the remainder of One Tree Hill. |
What did everyone think of the premiere tonight!?
With love,
Shelby
xoxox
January 11, 2012
Brad Paisley Quote
"Life is about conquering it (fear). No doubt about it. I believe one thing we are all here to do is learn how to overcome our fears and doubts, whatever they may be. Learn how to beat the things that keep us down."
Fear & Failure
"Fear can hold you back from so many wonderful things in life, so I make myself go for things I'm afraid of. Worry afterward!" ~LeAnn Rimes~
This quote has always stuck with me after reading it in Seventeen Magazine a few years back. Whenever I'd start to freak myself out or try to come up with excuses as to why I shouldn't do something I'd always wanted to, every once in awhile this would come back to mind, and it would help me put things into perspective.
I don't want to live a life full of regrets. 30-40 years from now, I don't want to look back on my life and think about all the things I wish I had done. I think you're better off to learn from your mistakes, when you aren't sure of something than to sit there and wonder what could have been. Regret turns to bitterness, and sucks you out of just living in the moment. You play those defining moments over and over again in your mind; but no matter how many times you do, it doesn't change the outcome. It will haunt you everyday until you change something. So, you wallow and feel sorry for yourself for the way things have become.
One of my biggest fears is failure. I don't know many people that like it, but at times I get to the point where I'm really afraid of it. Back in Jr. Hi and even high school, I would let the fear in my mind build up so much that I'd talk myself out of something. I was so afraid of striking out, so to speak, that I wouldn't even bother at all. I hate disappointing others around me and I don't like not living up to the expectations I've had for myself. As I'm getting older, though, I'm learning you just have to go for it. We're human, we make mistakes, and the things we do aren't always going to be smooth sailing. However, we have so much to gain and so much to lose if we don't just jump. I know that would have been the case many times over the past couple years if I hadn't just gone for something. I would've missed out on growth in myself and meeting new people that have forever changed my life.
Don't live a life of regrets. This speech is still for me as well, because it's something I deal with everyday. Take that leap of faith, jump into whatever it is God is calling you to, and live in the moment...because you never know when that's going to be taken away from you.
I'll leave you with this, "What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?" It's a great reminder when you're thinking about going for a goal or a dream you've always wanted.
This quote has always stuck with me after reading it in Seventeen Magazine a few years back. Whenever I'd start to freak myself out or try to come up with excuses as to why I shouldn't do something I'd always wanted to, every once in awhile this would come back to mind, and it would help me put things into perspective.
I don't want to live a life full of regrets. 30-40 years from now, I don't want to look back on my life and think about all the things I wish I had done. I think you're better off to learn from your mistakes, when you aren't sure of something than to sit there and wonder what could have been. Regret turns to bitterness, and sucks you out of just living in the moment. You play those defining moments over and over again in your mind; but no matter how many times you do, it doesn't change the outcome. It will haunt you everyday until you change something. So, you wallow and feel sorry for yourself for the way things have become.
One of my biggest fears is failure. I don't know many people that like it, but at times I get to the point where I'm really afraid of it. Back in Jr. Hi and even high school, I would let the fear in my mind build up so much that I'd talk myself out of something. I was so afraid of striking out, so to speak, that I wouldn't even bother at all. I hate disappointing others around me and I don't like not living up to the expectations I've had for myself. As I'm getting older, though, I'm learning you just have to go for it. We're human, we make mistakes, and the things we do aren't always going to be smooth sailing. However, we have so much to gain and so much to lose if we don't just jump. I know that would have been the case many times over the past couple years if I hadn't just gone for something. I would've missed out on growth in myself and meeting new people that have forever changed my life.
Don't live a life of regrets. This speech is still for me as well, because it's something I deal with everyday. Take that leap of faith, jump into whatever it is God is calling you to, and live in the moment...because you never know when that's going to be taken away from you.
I'll leave you with this, "What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?" It's a great reminder when you're thinking about going for a goal or a dream you've always wanted.
January 10, 2012
Last Week Of Adolescence
"Growing up is never easy. You hold onto things that were. You wonder what's to come. But, that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days, new days, days to come. The thing is, we didn't have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves for growing up." ~Kevin Arnold (The Wonder Years)~
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I never thought that saying goodbye to my kid/teen years would be that hard. Truthfully, I guess I didn't think about that moment when it would happen...it was just sort of this far off idea that would come, "someday." Well, it looks like someday will be happening Friday. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I will be turning 20 years old. I don't think it has completely sunk in yet, but the more I think about it...the more nervous I'm becoming. It's a way bigger deal than I ever imagined, and feels extremely weird. Not gonna lie.
Today, I decided to pull out some old journals from when I was about 13-14, out of curiosity to see how much I've grown and changed from the days of first becoming a teenager. I was so excited to be 13, because I thought things were really going to change. All the things I had seen played out on Full House, Boy Meets World, and all those other 90s shows were going to become relevant to my life. It was fun to see what I was thinking, what I was hoping for, who my favorite people were, and what my dreams were for the future.
First off, my writing was very mediocre; almost to the point that it makes me cringe, like I wasn't trying at all. When I look past that and hear the voice coming through, I hear a girl who knew what she wanted, but was just too afraid to speak up for fear of people criticizing or picking on her like in elementary school. I see a girl who was full of life and didn't know bitterness. She worried a lot, but she was a dreamer. She'd been hurt before, but she knew she could rise above. She just wanted to fit in and feel like she belonged somewhere, but was trying so hard to stand out leave her mark wherever she went. It's also funny to see what I thought was acting so "mature" at the time...LOL. She was quick to get her feelings hurt, because she cared too much. She wasn't trying to be anyone else, she just wanted people to like her for who she was.
I was terrified of speaking in front of people, and it's funny to see that I said, "Pretty soon I won't be afraid at all." That happened this year! I finally grew into my confidence, and it has never felt better. That is one of the things I'm most proud of, because it will play a big part in the career I want to have in the future. I had always wanted to get to know people or voice my opinions, but was too scared to let people see that. I'm not as guarded as I used to be. I wanted people to look past my shyness and see that there was more to me than how I acted at school.
I see the things that my friends and I thought were such a huge deal at the time, like petty drama where we'd argue over something stupid for no apparent reason (who liked who-the usual). We'd brainstorm about what high school would be like, where we'd go to college, and whether our kids would be friends when we were married and starting families of our own. We'd talk about our crazy daydreams of becoming singers and actors, and hanging out with the most elite celebs in Hollywood, which I think was like Jesse McCartney, Chad Michael Murray, and Hilary Duff for me at the time. I guess not much has changed ;) Haha. I talked about falling in love, and the things I hoped for in future relationships, and a few of my goals in life. So far, I'm still on the right track.
In the seven years of "teen-dom" I've experienced, I realized that I am still the same girl. I have the same heart, the same goals, same dreams, and most of my interests have come back around. I've matured, and know more of my beliefs and no one can change that. I've grown in my walk with God, and just realize He's going to take control of what happens next. My 13 year old self just had a hard time speaking up and let fear hold her back from really wonderful things. I would tell her to do them anyway, and worry about it later. Don't be so down on yourself all the time; we all make mistakes, and you just have to accept it and move on. And don't worry so much about what others think, just do your own thing and you'll be fine. Don't let others make you feel inferior; you are good enough and capable of living the life you want to.
It's weird to think that I'm going to officially be an "adult" now. I think now would probably be a good time to get my license and a job. I've been putting off these things or just talking about them for way too long now, and it's time to just jump. There's no looking back. I wouldn't do anything over again even if I could, because everything I did during those years has brought me to this point. I'm proud of who I am becoming, and the road God is leading me on at this very moment. I have no idea what's going to happen in the years to come; that's both exciting and terrifying.
Brooke Davis and Nathan Scott both said, "For now, I say goodbye to this chapter of my life...and look forward to what comes next." I can't think of a better way to put this! I'm excited about all the experiences and opportunities that will be coming my way, and I look forward to being ready this time, and not making excuses because I'm afraid. I'm trusting the Lord, and realizing that whatever happens, happens. It's all going to be okay.
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
____________________________________
I never thought that saying goodbye to my kid/teen years would be that hard. Truthfully, I guess I didn't think about that moment when it would happen...it was just sort of this far off idea that would come, "someday." Well, it looks like someday will be happening Friday. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I will be turning 20 years old. I don't think it has completely sunk in yet, but the more I think about it...the more nervous I'm becoming. It's a way bigger deal than I ever imagined, and feels extremely weird. Not gonna lie.
Today, I decided to pull out some old journals from when I was about 13-14, out of curiosity to see how much I've grown and changed from the days of first becoming a teenager. I was so excited to be 13, because I thought things were really going to change. All the things I had seen played out on Full House, Boy Meets World, and all those other 90s shows were going to become relevant to my life. It was fun to see what I was thinking, what I was hoping for, who my favorite people were, and what my dreams were for the future.
First off, my writing was very mediocre; almost to the point that it makes me cringe, like I wasn't trying at all. When I look past that and hear the voice coming through, I hear a girl who knew what she wanted, but was just too afraid to speak up for fear of people criticizing or picking on her like in elementary school. I see a girl who was full of life and didn't know bitterness. She worried a lot, but she was a dreamer. She'd been hurt before, but she knew she could rise above. She just wanted to fit in and feel like she belonged somewhere, but was trying so hard to stand out leave her mark wherever she went. It's also funny to see what I thought was acting so "mature" at the time...LOL. She was quick to get her feelings hurt, because she cared too much. She wasn't trying to be anyone else, she just wanted people to like her for who she was.
I was terrified of speaking in front of people, and it's funny to see that I said, "Pretty soon I won't be afraid at all." That happened this year! I finally grew into my confidence, and it has never felt better. That is one of the things I'm most proud of, because it will play a big part in the career I want to have in the future. I had always wanted to get to know people or voice my opinions, but was too scared to let people see that. I'm not as guarded as I used to be. I wanted people to look past my shyness and see that there was more to me than how I acted at school.
I see the things that my friends and I thought were such a huge deal at the time, like petty drama where we'd argue over something stupid for no apparent reason (who liked who-the usual). We'd brainstorm about what high school would be like, where we'd go to college, and whether our kids would be friends when we were married and starting families of our own. We'd talk about our crazy daydreams of becoming singers and actors, and hanging out with the most elite celebs in Hollywood, which I think was like Jesse McCartney, Chad Michael Murray, and Hilary Duff for me at the time. I guess not much has changed ;) Haha. I talked about falling in love, and the things I hoped for in future relationships, and a few of my goals in life. So far, I'm still on the right track.
In the seven years of "teen-dom" I've experienced, I realized that I am still the same girl. I have the same heart, the same goals, same dreams, and most of my interests have come back around. I've matured, and know more of my beliefs and no one can change that. I've grown in my walk with God, and just realize He's going to take control of what happens next. My 13 year old self just had a hard time speaking up and let fear hold her back from really wonderful things. I would tell her to do them anyway, and worry about it later. Don't be so down on yourself all the time; we all make mistakes, and you just have to accept it and move on. And don't worry so much about what others think, just do your own thing and you'll be fine. Don't let others make you feel inferior; you are good enough and capable of living the life you want to.
It's weird to think that I'm going to officially be an "adult" now. I think now would probably be a good time to get my license and a job. I've been putting off these things or just talking about them for way too long now, and it's time to just jump. There's no looking back. I wouldn't do anything over again even if I could, because everything I did during those years has brought me to this point. I'm proud of who I am becoming, and the road God is leading me on at this very moment. I have no idea what's going to happen in the years to come; that's both exciting and terrifying.
Brooke Davis and Nathan Scott both said, "For now, I say goodbye to this chapter of my life...and look forward to what comes next." I can't think of a better way to put this! I'm excited about all the experiences and opportunities that will be coming my way, and I look forward to being ready this time, and not making excuses because I'm afraid. I'm trusting the Lord, and realizing that whatever happens, happens. It's all going to be okay.
That's all for now,
Shelby
xoxox
January 9, 2012
High School Flashbacks
Alright, so I've only been out of school for a little over a couple years, but watching One Tree Hill has actually had me (somewhat) missing those high school days. I hated it while I was in there, and I've made that very well known...but watching them has made me wish I could go back. I think I'd do things a little differently, but then again I guess doing it the way I did made me who I am now, and I couldn't be happier now. I thought I'd post some of my favorite memories like:
"The truth is, I really don't like to think about college. Cause that means high school's over. After graduation, everyone will probably go play basketball. Or sing or start record labels. And I'll have to start all over. Alone. I'm sure I'll be fine. But like I said, I don't like to think about it." ~Brooke Davis~
"Yeah, the future is scary, you know the world can be threatening. But, you should know sometimes when things seem the most desperate, people find you. Help is out there, and you are not alone." ~Haley James Scott!~
I don't think I realized how crazy things would get, or how much they would change after high school. In some ways, it feels like everything has. And in others, it feels like absolutely nothing has. I guess that's both good and bad. My emotions are sort of wishy washy when it comes to deciding how to feel about that. So, maybe those weren't my best days, but they were pretty good now that I see it from the outside looking in.
To all you high schoolers out there, just take it all in...and realize it doesn't last forever. That can be one of the saddest thoughts, or greatest reliefs depending on how you look at it. Get involved, make new friends, forget about the people that don't matter, try your best when it comes to work, and don't let negativity run your life. Be your own person and realize that you're gonna do greater things in your life than you could ever imagine. Who you are in high school doesn't mean you have to be labeled as that forever.
That's all,
Shelby
xoxox
- Going to Hume Lake with the entire school all four years
- Prom
- Powderpuff
- Homecoming/building the floats
- Plays
- Singing the National Anthem at Basketball games
- Football games
- Rallies
- Talent shows
- Birthday parties
- Lunch adventures with the gang
"Yeah, the future is scary, you know the world can be threatening. But, you should know sometimes when things seem the most desperate, people find you. Help is out there, and you are not alone." ~Haley James Scott!~
I don't think I realized how crazy things would get, or how much they would change after high school. In some ways, it feels like everything has. And in others, it feels like absolutely nothing has. I guess that's both good and bad. My emotions are sort of wishy washy when it comes to deciding how to feel about that. So, maybe those weren't my best days, but they were pretty good now that I see it from the outside looking in.
To all you high schoolers out there, just take it all in...and realize it doesn't last forever. That can be one of the saddest thoughts, or greatest reliefs depending on how you look at it. Get involved, make new friends, forget about the people that don't matter, try your best when it comes to work, and don't let negativity run your life. Be your own person and realize that you're gonna do greater things in your life than you could ever imagine. Who you are in high school doesn't mean you have to be labeled as that forever.
That's all,
Shelby
xoxox
Week in Pictures
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| Finished Brad Paisley's book |
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| My little buddy, Mittens |
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| Some of the best chocolate ever! |
If You Really Knew Me...
We've all heard the expression, "There's more to_____ than meets the eye!" And I think that saying is true to all of us. I think there are many sides to everyone; some people bring out the worst in us, while others bring out the best. Some people bring out the artsy/fun side of us, while others bring out the more serious/toned down version of us. I think sometimes we catch people at an off moment and judge them based on that for the rest of their lives. But, the thing is ...we're all human. You can be the nicest person, but still lose your temper every now and then. There's more to a person than just what you see of them in the first five minutes of meeting. Give them a chance before you start labeling them as this or that.
I used to be extremely shy. I didn't really speak unless spoken to, and even then, I was extremely nervous and fumbled for just the right words to say. I used to get incredibly nervous when just talking to people at church, or presentations. I've come a long way since then, because God has helped me find the courage that was always inside of me, it just took me a little while to recognize it in myself. I'm a lot more open than I used to be, so there aren't many things that people don't know about me anymore really.
- If you really knew me...You'd know I have been hurt verbally in the past, by people that were close to me. Those words stuck with me for many years, but finally I let them go. I forgave those people, and I've moved on. I am not bound by the words or things that they said about me anymore.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that I'm really hard on myself when I make mistakes. I will over analyze something I've done until I'm blue in the face. I used to feel that need to be perfect, even though I knew it was unachievable.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that I love my family and friends more than anything (well, not God, but you know what I mean). I don't always show them how much I care, but words will never be able to express what they've done for me and how they've changed my life.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that one of the hardest times in my life was losing my grandma. I was really close with her, and when she passed away it hit me like a TON of bricks. At the time, Danny Gokey was on American Idol and he had just lost his wife not too long before that. He'll probably never know it, but he helped me SO much during that time; he reminded me to have hope and trust in God, because even through all of that pain he was suffering through, he had so much joy.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that my heart and soul are a lot more sensitive than I let on. I try to act tough or get an attitude to show that it doesn't bother me, but most of the time it does.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that the people I look up to most in the business are: Taylor Swift, Carrie Underwood, Danny Gokey, Keith Urban, Nick Jonas, and Bethany Galeotti. They're people that really seem to care about people, making a difference, and are in the business because they enjoy what they do; not because it pays well or they get the recognition, but because they have a story to tell and want to make a difference.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that I wish I lived in a small town, much like Stars Hollow on Gilmore Girls. That would be ideal for me!
- If you really knew me...You'd know that I used to be pretty self conscious, and care a lot more about what others thought about me. Now, those opinions just really don't matter to me.
- If you really knew me...You'd know that I'd never thought of getting married before a couple years ago. I wanted to be single all of my life. However, now, the idea of getting married makes me feel really excited...of course, way in the future, not right now.
Alright, so I know it wasn't the most exciting thing, but I had seen it done on another blog and thought I'd try it. But, again there's not really much about me that others don't know. I share a lot on here; I don't have anything to hide....soooo. I think I'm gonna try to find more fun surveys, just to switch things up a little bit :)
That's all for now,
Shelby
January 8, 2012
Team True Beauty Event
Yesterday morning when I woke up, I hurried to find some shoes to wear to the Team True Beauty event, did some last minute packing, and got ready so I'd be set to go when my dad got home. I even had time to watch a little One Tree Hill on Soap Net before leaving ;) It didn't take us too long to get down there, which was nice. We checked into our hotel and started getting ready pretty soon after. My parents had to run to Target, so I stayed in the room and curled my hair. Before I knew it, it was time to go. I was kind of nervous actually; not really sure of what to expect, but also really excited to see/meet everyone! However, since it is LA, we ran into some traffic...and on a street that we have never had trouble with in all the times we've been down there, thanks to road work. We ended up making it in plenty of time to catch the red carpet and see everyone arrive. I felt like I was going to Prom, but realized this was much cooler than that.
The location of the evening was really beautiful. It's a nightclub type setting on North Vine in Hollywood, with lavish decorations and romantic lighting. It's pretty intimate, so at the beginning, it was a little crowded trying to see where the celebrities were signing. Sharon Lawrence, who plays Julian's mom on One Tree Hill had come in behind us, so I tried to get a picture with her as soon as possible. She was so sweet; we introduced ourselves, and I told her I loved her on the show; she said thank you, I love the show or something to that affect! We tried a couple takes on the picture, but it didn't come out, and she ended up having to go. We made our way into the room more, and met some of the other ladies that were signing.
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| The room...I slept on a sofa bed! |
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| Dad was watching random videos on YouTube and we were laughing hysterically |
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| It's a "One Tree Hill" picture...Lame, I know |
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| My parents |
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| Traffic |
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| Jodie Sweetin (Stephanie, Full House) Jodie: Hi, what's your name? (signing my book) Me: Shelby Jodie: S-h-e-l-b-y? Me: Yeah. I still watch Full House all the time! Jodie: Thank you! God knows it's on all the time... Me: (laugh) Yeah, that's true! |
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| Me and Shantel VanSanten (Quinn, One Tree Hill) I told Shantel I loved her on the show, and she was very gracious and humble! She said thank you so much, and you could tell she really meant it. We got our picture, then I told her she had tweeted me the other day. She was like really? What did you say? Usually I only tweet people back if it's something clever or something I like, etc. I was like I asked you what your favorite part about Christmas was. She was like oh yeah, I remember answering that! My mom added that I had gone to the Evening with One Tree Hill Thursday, and she was like "really? That is so cool. I tried to meet people that were hanging out by there afterwards, but security would not let me, because they said people were crazy!" And later on, we ended up eating right by her (even though we didn't really talk to her haha); she even sat next to my mom on the couch. If that doesn't motivate you to work out, I don't know what will ;) LOL.     Savannah Outen. I told her I had seen some of her stuff on YouTube and that she was really good. She said thank you so much, I'll be playing around 8, so hopefully you'll be able to check it out. I was like I'll be here all night, so I will. After the show, she came back to get her stuff which was by where we were sitting, and I was able to tell her that she did a great job :)  I kept waiting to see Bethany Joy Galeotti, but she was running late and still hadn't made it there yet. I asked one of the girls, Michelle, who had started the organization if she was going to make it, and she said yeah she was on her way! We waited a little while, until they started serving dinner. We found a free seat, which happened to be by Shantel's signing station, and were just carrying on. A few minutes later Joy walked in, and I was so happy! There was a small group starting to form around her. Not too many people were in the dining area, though, unless you had a wristband. She talked to Shantel for a few minutes, then I squeezed in.  After we finished eating, we went into this other lounge area where the concert was taking place. Sharon Lawrence ended up sitting by us with her in-laws, which was fun! I saw Shantel, Daphne, and a few of the other girls around the rest of the night as well, which was cool. It was so relaxed, you felt like you were really getting to know them, and you were just "hanging out" in a sense. They had so many talented musicians perform like Everly and Savannah Outen. There was also a magician, Justin Willman, who was hilarious, and brought up Daphne and her boyfriend for a trick! Shantel also went up to give a speech, and just about brought tears and inspired everyone in the room. I wish I would have gotten a video of it, because it was amazing. I have more pictures and videos of Everly, and some of the other musicians that I'm going to try to post later on tonight.   It was a beautiful night that I will never forget, and I love what the organization stands for. I'm a big advocate for going against what the media pushes on teenage girls these days, and that beauty really does come from within, no matter how cliche it sounds. You can be gorgeous, but if you treat people like crap, it really doesn't matter. This night celebrated so many genuinely beautiful and talented women in the industry that are making a difference whether it's through speaking, acting, or music. They are passionate, driven, and prove to everyone that you are worthy of your dreams and it's just enough to be YOU! I couldn't have asked for a better Christmas present, and what a way to start off my birthday week ;) LOL. Today, we woke up, got ready and drove to Valencia. First, we made a little detour at this movie/TV prop warehouse that was having a liquidation sale. They had a lot of cool stuff, even though I didn't recognize most of the items (except for things that were on State of Georgia). We shopped at Stein Mart for a little while and had lunch at Wood Ranch BBQ (SO good!), and came home after that because my dad wanted to watch a football game. I hung out for most of the afternoon and tried to take a nap. Tonight, we ended up going to this local ice creamery/restaurant for dinner and one of my best friends met up with us. We spent a lot of time talking and catching up, and laughing as always! I had a blast.    That's all for now, Shelby |
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