February 22, 2013

Free Your Mind

Last night, my head was filled with so many thoughts, as it often is and has been for most of this week, but this time, I couldn't just turn them off. As the night went on, it started pounding even more. I should have taken medicine then, but I was too into a new book my mom had given me, and didn't want to take the time to get up from my comfy position to get any.
Eventually, I turned off the light on my nightstand and the room went pitch black. I thought that would help, but it didn't. My head was still swirling with thoughts and in so much pain, I almost started feeling sick. I tossed and turned a couple of times, staring at my wall and the ceiling, while struggling to fall asleep. A few minutes later, I was out.

This morning, I was still in a lot of pain, so this time, I took medicine for it. I lie awake in bed; reading that same book, then sipping tea and having toast. I could slowly start to feel the pain going away. Things were looking up. A little later in the afternoon, it came back, so I decided not to go to practice at church to get some things into perspective and relax, took some more medicine, which made me very sleepy, and I ended up taking a nap for the next two hours or so! I woke up feeling a bit woozy, took a shower, and worked on a story I'm brainstorming about. I felt a little more refreshed and calm than I had yesterday.

This was probably the most pointless story ever, but there is a moral that I'm trying to get around to. Sometimes, it's good to just do nothing. When your mind and body are constantly always moving and wandering about for no reason at all, it gives us more opportunity to miss those still and quiet moments when God wants to speak to our hearts. I realized that the reason I've been in such a slump, is because I've been keeping myself way more busy than I've needed to be. I've been rushing through everything for no reason, and I haven't been letting God be in control. I've been trying to figure everything out myself, and thats just a bad idea waiting to happen. God is where I find peace and that's where I find rest.

Today was a nice little wake up call of what I need to do. I have nothing to worry about and why stress about things that haven't happened yet? Everything is going to be okay. God is on my side.

That's all for now,

February 20, 2013

My Playlist


Here are just some of the songs I'm really loving right now!

Every Storm (Runs Out of Rain)-Gary Allan
Better Dig Two- The Band Perry
Pay Phone- Maroon 5
You Can Go Your Own Way- Lissie
The Highway Don't Care-Tim McGraw, Taylor Swift and Keith Urban
Catch My Breath-Kelly Clarkson
Ho Hey- The Lumineers
Suit and Tie- Justin Timberlake
It's Time- Imagine Dragons
Say Anything- Tristan Prettyman
Moonshine- Sara Haze
Home- Sarah Darling
Bruises- Train and Ashley Monroe
More Than Miles- Brantley Gilbert
Sign Of Life-LeAnn Rimes
Downtown- Lady Antebellum

Be Brave

"Standing there at the stage door to the rest of your life. Time to dip your toes into the deep end. Try things. Say hi already. Laugh a lot. Mess up. Apologize. Mess up again. Hug people. Take chances. Trust yourself. Lose things. Get over it. Hold your friends close. Gather your strengths. Gain wisdom and beautiful stories. Be brave and you'll have the time of your life."

~Taylor Swift~

This is my new motto. There's no more hiding or pretending who I'm meant to be. I'm going to be open and honest. I don't have time to hold back. I'm going to get exactly what I want; what I've always dreamed of. And I'm not going to let fear or anyone else get in the way of that. I'm going to let myself be happy, because it's okay to do that. We only have one shot at life, so I'm not going to wait for a second chance to come around when my time is now.

Night Owl

You know... I'm a very strange creature. I guess I always have been, but the older I get, the more I'm aware of this.

All throughout the day, I'm tired and mopey, then night falls and I'm wide awake. All of a sudden, I get these brilliant ideas for stories or posts for my blog or what I can do for another video. I brainstorm all day, trying to get into that creative zone and nothing. Then, midnight hits and I'm ready for all of the ideas in the world and I'm ready to tackle that project I've been thinking about for days.... My life has always worked this way. Even as a child (around the age of 4-5), I was a night owl... During the school week, I was up until 11 or midnight, and my grades were perfectly fine. So, my parents never cared that much, and especially because of the hours my dad worked, I was able to spend more time with him.

I have several things that I have to do tomorrow that will take my attention and focus and energy... So, I should probably get to bed soon, but I've decided to start watching videos of Ian Somerhalder on YouTube and once again... Brainstorming. But really, I shall get ready for bed, possibly watch the latest episode of Pretty Little Liars and lie in bed, staring at the ceiling several hours before falling asleep.

Should be fun!


February 19, 2013

A Day in my Life

A typical day in my life is actually pretty boring. I honestly don't do much...At least right now, because I'm in the middle of transitioning to another school and all that jazz. I have a couple things in the works, but they don't take up much time. So, here's what I do. I decided not to wear makeup for this video, because honestly...Who cares? I have terrible skin, but I'm not hiding behind that anymore and I'm not going to let that make me feel insecure or bad about myself. Life's too short and it's just not worth it to me.

Here's the latest video

I also have a bonus video of some other random things I've been up to! Here ya go!

That's all for now,

Let me know what you think about these videos!

The Weekend Review

Saturday mornings are typically the same routine; I wake up late, take my time getting ready, while watching Saved by the Bell on MTV2, and waiting to see what the day holds. I had some hot tea and took it easy, since I still wasn't feeling too great. It was perfect! I also started messing around with an app I've had for awhile, and just found a new feature. It's pretty awesome, so I spent time editing pictures with that.

My parents and I finished getting ready, then ended up going to the town where my dad works to eat lunch and spend the day. We listened to the Safe Haven soundtrack on the way up, and it was perfect for the occasion. It's a lot of countryside, and the simple tunes were so easy to listen to, you couldn't help but daydream. My dad had gotten a gift certificate, so we decided to try the restaurant, Dickey's BBQ out, and it was really good. After lunch, we explored the town a bit; went to a few stores, my dad showed us a few stops that he delivers to and some of the places he talks about all the time, and we ended up going into a really cool store with all sorts of gifts and home goods.

The rest of the night, we hung out at home. I was bored, trying to figure out what I should do, and then we went to dinner at Panera, which was amazing. We also got free Easter cookies, which was awesome. We mainly talked about The Brady Bunch at dinner that night, because my mom and I have been watching it a lot lately, so that was fun. Dinner was good too! When we finished, we ended up just driving around town, which I love doing. 
We came home, watched some Jeopardy, and as I started getting ready for bed, I started feeling horrible again.

I ended up being up most of the night, throwing up and feeling miserable. I tried to take my mind off of things by watching some episodes of Boy Meets World. Around 5 a.m, I fell asleep and woke up around 8, still feeling sick. I didn't go to church; I just stayed in bed, trying to take it easy, watched Parenthood, got a bit of writing done, and talked to one of my best friends. My parents brought home lunch from Denny's, and I was starting to feel better, but ended up taking a nap for a few hours, which did me a world of good. I was starting to get a little energy back, so I took a shower and got ready. A little while later, we went out to dinner with some family friends, had some ice cream with them, and while it probably wasn't good to eat so heavy after being sick...I'm used to it; I know what I can handle and what I can't, so I was good.
My parents dropped me off, where I spent the time watching more Parenthood and feeling artsy, and they went to the grocery store. It was a nice time! 

I had a really good weekend, despite the getting sick part. It's definitely reminding me of how I need to take care of myself and just getting back into eating better, exercising and all that jazz. It's definitely a motivator, if nothing else. 

That's all for now,

February 18, 2013

Valentine's Day

I love Valentine's Day! Which is not something you hear a lot of people say these days, including my friends. Sometimes, yes, I get bitter about it, because of how annoying the media is with its mushy commercials and giving the impression that you HAVE to have a "Valentine" if you want to celebrate the day, sort of thing. But, overall, I love what it represents. I've always loved the creativity behind those sweet sentimental gifts people give one another, like cards and treats or even the date ideas that boyfriends surprise their girlfriends with. However, lately, it has turned into one crazy, ridiculously expensive holiday for no apparent reason at all, other than money.

With all of that aside, I love the fact that no Valentine's days I've experienced have ever been the same. There have been times that I've spent the day with my parents going out of town, another that I spent at the hospital and at dinner with my entire family (when my grandma was really sick), going to the movies with my cousin to see Valentine's Day, and now this one, where I spent it with a mixture of people. One of these days, I would like to have an official Valentine... Like, Nick Jonas or someone...But, until then, I'm just enjoying the people that are in my life right now; having the time of my life.

So, last Thursday, I woke up at decent hour; got ready, had coffee, got a few things done, and headed out for a fun day with my mom. We went to The Marketplace, picked up our tickets for the movie, Safe Haven, then had lunch at Johnny Rocket's. We don't go there very often, because they're kind of expensive for the quality of food that it is, but this time we were pleasantly surprised. The burgers were really good and the prices weren't all that bad. If you haven't caught on before..I love diners. I would love to have my own someday; just throwing that out there. They had 50s music playing, while my mom talked about South Carolina and other random thoughts that came up, and pretty soon, our food came. We ate, then shortly after, decided to walk to Rite Aid to get some candy before the movies. I decided to keep with a theme and get some of the Valentine candy that was on sale; a couple boxes of chocolates with animals on top and a plastic lip lollipop.
We headed back to the theater, because it was getting closer to showtime, and I was getting anxious. We had to wait a little while once inside, but I kept myself occupied with candy and a few of the bonus features they were showing on screen. Just as the show was about to start, the screen froze and when it actually started...There were close to 30 minutes of previews, which I was so not in the mood for. Eventually the movie started, and within the first five minutes, I already knew I was going to love it. I had my doubts about Julianne Hough playing Katie, but after seeing her in action, I think she was totally perfect for the role. She was very toned down from most of the other roles that she has played, and she really told the story well. I always thought Josh was perfect for the role; one, because he fits the description or could fit it well enough, and two, because I've just always really loved him. Him and Julianne had great chemistry on screen together. It is definitely my new favorite.

We came home, and I was just still in awe of the movie; playing back scenes in my head and just feeling really good! I love movies that just put you in a giddy mood and that make you feel inspired; that's what the magic of movies should be all about. I watched a few interviews of Josh, Julianne and Nicholas Sparks that I had recorded and I was so in the mood to see the movie again, especially after that.
Not much later, I had to go to practice at church for the worship team, so my mom dropped me off. I waited awhile before most of the team showed up, then we got started. There were only two singers this week, including me, so it was just us practicing, which actually worked out pretty well. We went over a couple songs, which I'm still struggling with because they're in a different key, and trying to find the part was a bit difficult. I worked with the worship leader on it for a few minutes, but by the time we started, I was still trying to find it again. We came to the conclusion that I'll be one of the singers this week...So, I'm really hoping I can figure something out to make it sound decent enough for the time being, but I'm still really nervous and not feeling comfortable with the songs.
Practice didn't last long, and I was able to catch up or say hi to a few people that I don't always get to, for a few minutes, which was nice. I miss having that fellowship with everyone each week. I need to get back into it, but trying to get back into the swing of things is always the hardest part.
After practice, I came home and one of my best friends came over. We talked for a little while, catching up, of course; I was venting, then we decided to grab food. I was starving and in a really weird mood, so off we went. The first restaurant we went to had a really long line, so we ended up at Panda Express, then brought food back to my house, while my parents went out. We got home in time to watch The Office, while eating our Chinese food and it was perfect. Although, I have to say The Office is really starting to worry me with what they're doing to Jim and Pam...I mean, c'mon, it's the last season. But, John and Jenna sure know how to make it super realistic and believable.

Marissa brought me chocolates!!!!! :)
After The Office ended, Marissa and I continued to talk, then caught the ending of The Wedding Planner. We can always talk and not run out of anything to say, which I love. She stayed a little bit later than usual, because she came over later, and we came to the conclusion that one of these days she just needs to spend the night. DUH! I walked her out to her car, then decided to hit the hay pretty soon after.
Then, I got really SICK once again. I was starting to feel bad when I went to bed and thought it would eventually go away, but it didn't. I was up awhile, throwing up a couple times, and feeling miserable, then finally went to sleep.

It was a really great day/night! I look forward to Valentine's Day next year too :)


The Weekly Review

Last week was rather interesting. I've started doing some freelance work as a writer for one of the magazines in town, so that took a bit of time to contact people, get some research, and actually write an article. I was trying to work on another one, as well, but I still haven't been able to get that one finished.  I'm hoping this week will be better in that department.

My friend, Febe, and I signed up for the Catalyst convention that will be in Orange County again this spring, and we're SUPER excited about it.

Got into the festive mood for Valentine's Day! Made some yummy treats :)

I received my diploma in the mail...So, now it is official that I have my AA in liberal arts/communications! Probably one of my proudest accomplishments!

I was sick for most of the week, throwing up off and on, which was miserable...

I also got to spend some time with my best friend and see Safe Haven on Valentine's Day! I also went to practice for the worship team that night, which was...Interesting. (I will go into more detail about Valentine's Day in a separate post!)

I'm feeling incredibly inspired lately! Instead of just wanting to brainstorm about something, I've wanted to do something about it and get it done. I'm excited for the changes that are happening, but it's also a little scary at the same time. It's good to grow, though, otherwise we'd be stuck in the same place for the rest of our lives, and that's something I don't want. So, I have to push myself to do the hard things at times. I've found that it is always worth it in the end. 

That's all for now,