It's kind of strange how our perspective of something can change in such a short amount of time-the beginning of a school semester, the "new year" as it unfolds, a new relationship while you're in the blissful state of love and adoration. The list goes on and on.
But, then the newness fades and now you just have broken dreams and fragments of the vision you had. At least that's my experience with these things. You go in with such high hopes and expectations, but the script isn't quite following what you had planned, and it can really break your heart.
I've been going to school and I keep waiting for that epiphany or "light bulb" moment to go off in my mind, and for everything to feel like it's really falling into place. Like, this is what I'm meant to be doing. Am I grateful for this opportunity? Absolutely. I remember sitting in the classroom the first couple weeks of school (and even though I might have been dreading the work to some degree) and wanting to pinch myself over the fact that I'm going to school for one of my passions and dreams, when so many people would love to be in the position I'm in. But, I'd also be lying if I said that I've been enjoying every second of it. Because I haven't.
I've done a lot of questioning and wondering when things are going to get more interesting or when I'm going to feel like...Yup, this is it. This is the moment I've been waiting for. I guess it takes time and this is all part of that journey. But, I sure wish the journey would speed up a little, you know?
That's all for now,