I was never much of a social butterfly, like I am learning to be now, so football games always felt more like a chore to me. I usually felt awkward the entire time, and the forget the bleachers, I didn't want to go anywhere near them for the most part. Senior year, I made it a goal to go to all of the home games, and it was fun, but it wouldn't have been complete without drama and trying to keep up with everyone. And there was plenty of that. After graduating, I didn't really have a desire to go back. Four years felt like enough time for me. I went to homecoming in 2010, and haven't been back since. I felt like most of the people didn't care about who I was or what I was doing then, so why would they care now? But, after talking to Marissa, I decided to go. It was always a good time, so we were looking forward to it this time around.
Marissa picked me up around 6:30 or so, and I was finally able to meet her boyfriend after they've been together like a year now. CRAZY! Later on, I also got to meet another one of her really good friends that she's known forever and told me a lot about. We didn't have to pay, since we were alumni, then headed inside the gates. It was weird walking onto the grounds and not really knowing anyone, except for a few teachers and a few seniors I had known at the time, and not recognizing any of the names they'd call for the football players. It's sad how as time goes by, you're less and less connected to things that were once so familiar and second nature to you.
I talked to my old english, Bible, and chemistry teachers. It was good to catch up with them, and see how their kids had changed in just a couple years. I also thought it was funny that almost all of the teachers and students I ran into said something about me meeting with Carrie Underwood the night before and asking how the concert was, I guess that's what happens when you're all still friends on Facebook. They'd ask how I was doing, what I was majoring in, and other things like that, but I was just glad they remembered me after having so many students in the meantime. It's also crazy to me, that some people I used to talk to quite a bit, now we just stick to the small talk. "How are you?", "Where are you going to school?", "That's good," "It was nice seeing you." And that's that. But, people come and go from your life for a reason. I just keep holding onto that, rather than looking back. Why hold onto something that isn't there anymore?
We went over to the special "Alumni" section on the football field to visit with teachers and some students that were in our class. It was fun getting to catch up, but around halftime, we were kind of over it. We grabbed something to eat, walked around for a little just to explore, watched the floats (the theme was "All Around The World" or something like that, so they played the Justin Bieber song by the same name) and ended up right back where we were. I did appreciate all the country music they were playing; they were always pretty good about that, since a lot of the kids that went there had families in dairy and agriculture, and lived that kind of life. We talked to Marissa's boyfriend and friend, Mike for a little while, and a few others, which was fun and the game ended. Our school won! Woo! There was a dance afterwards, but we didn't go. I rarely enjoyed going when we were in high school, so that didn't even seem to be a question now. Plus, I'm not sure if alumni was actually invited anyway.
Marissa and I recalled some moments at football games in the past. She remembered how excited she was for our first football game, and I remember getting ready that night, thinking, "Ugh! Do I really have to go?" I was extremely insecure, and felt like I didn't really have any friends and didn't look like all the other "pretty faces" that seemed to be getting all of the attention. Looking back on that now, it's hard to even imagine that I felt that way, but it was something I struggled with for quite some time. It was sad not seeing a lot of the main group I used to hang around with, but we've all seemed to have moved onto other things, and others are out of state, so it's hard.
It was a good night to reminisce, and to see how we've all changed since then. I think I've grown up a lot since then, even though I have a long way to go. It's good to remember that a lot of important memories still happened there, even if it wasn't exactly the way I had planned. It was a great school, and a good four years. Could I have made them better in certain areas? Absolutely. But, I'm not going to sit around wishing I would've. I love my life exactly as it is. It all happened for a reason, and brings me to now. The friends that still want to be in my life are still there, and the rest are just beautiful memories of what used to be, and I can still treasure those just the same.
That's all for now,
Shelby
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